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Wednesday, May 5, 2010

switching gears

OK so I am back to being a single mommy again for awhile.......I HATE THIS PART.

I was stronger for this goodbye than I have ever been - didn't cry last night, even when hubby put his face against my belly and said a sweet goodbye to the baby.  Didn't cry this morning until the car was out of sight (hubby's dad drove him to his bus, since it is a couple hours away and I have to work this morning).

Not sure how I am going to WORK, even for a one hour shift, with this big hole in my heart, but I know I now have to begin that process of changing my whole mindset, to become that 'independent' single mom I hate being.  I don't mind the independent part, but the lonely SINGLE part I could definitely do without.

I know I can do this, but the whole pregnancy thing - having the baby all by myself - is a new and terrifying twist to the whole deployment nightmare.

4 comments:

  1. Wow managing not to cry whilst going through pregnancy hormones is an achievement...you are strong and you can so totally do this xoxo

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  2. I would never have been able to fight the tears with raging pregnancy hormones!

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  3. You are so strong! You can handle this and anything that comes your way :)

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  4. Oh I do understand. I had my own pity party today and yesterday. While I'm not pregnant, I can understand your grief at his leaving. That is something I'm currently trying to work through myself..and not doing it well I'm afraid. How long will he be gone?
    --Robyn

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